• Anne B.

Advice free? Advice free!


Is it true that professional coaching is advice free? What is that all about? You might think "why should I hire someone and they don't even tell me what I'm supposed to do in my relationships and how I can become successful, happy and fulfilled?" Sounds like a rip-off, or not?


First of all, the answer is yes. As I mentioned in the blogpost A Roadmap to Coaching professional coaching should be advice free. But why?


Well, let me ask you this: Have you ever listened to advice?


How did you react as a child when your parents told you how to behave?

How did you respond as a teenager when teachers told you what to do?

How do you feel when friends and family tell you which way you should go?

Do you like it when your partner tells you what to do?

How about that visit to your doctor when he tells you to let go of something that you really enjoy?


If we are honest with ourselves most of us don't like being told what to do in the first place, right?


There are, of course, exceptions. If you want to learn something and you have found a trustworthy instructor, you will listen to his advice. If you want to learn how to cook, how to play the piano, how to paint with watercolors, how to dance, how to edit pictures, how to ..., you will pay attention and you will try to put into action what they told you to do. However, you probably make sure that they are a professional in their field. This comes down to their qualification, their years of expertise and testimonies of other customers.


And I would argue that even in the areas where we would like to improve, there comes a time when it is not so easy to take advice any longer. The moment we have gained momentum, when we have become good at something, we will question the advice that someone else is trying to give us. At that point, we even feel comfortable to now give our own advice. We have now come full circle and how wonderful is that? We want to learn something, we listen to advice, we practice, we get it, we can now teach it to someone else and the circle begins again. Amazing.


But wait. You might now think "but aren't you trying to explain why a professional coach should not give me any advice?" Yes, I am and here is the difference. In the areas mentioned above there is usually a right or wrong way how to do it. Or at least an easy way. We learn a skill. There is a right way how to make a soufflé and there is a right way how to practice kung fu. There is a right way how to multiply and there is a right way how to pronounce words in another language . And listening to advice when we want to learn the basics will definitely help us to learn any skill faster.


However, coaching is not about learning a skill. It is about personal development. Your personal development. And it might be the hard way, but if you figure out what you would like to change in your life, chances are so much higher that you will follow through in your actions.


For example, someone can tell you what a perfect morning for a productive day should look like: you should get up at 5am. A professional coach however will ask you questions about what an ideal morning does look like to you. You might realize that you would like to get up at 5am or you might realize that you are not a morning person at all and that you are way more productive in the evening. Either way, you have figured out your own advice. How awesome is that?


COACHING because figuring out your own advice is way more effective.





MY ADVICE IS TO NEVER LISTEN TO ANY ADVICE, NOT EVEN THIS ONE. :-)

- found on CoolFunnyQuotes -





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